The internet is making me sad lately.  It just seems like such a downer all the time what with people getting angry and riled up and mocking and criticizing and ugh.  It can be such a source of goodness and encouragement sometimes.  I'm just not seeing it lately.

The posts have been further between the last few weeks because a little someone is popping two very painful front teeth.  Back to back with getting his bottom ones.  The poor baby.  He used to be the best sleeper and so content and now not so much.  And the poor babe is hurting.  (Any helpful teething advice appreciated...)  This lady is feeling it and no matter how much you tell yourself not to get used to sleeping, you still do.  And you miss it greatly.  And you get overly emotional about little things.  And you feel like there is no way God meant to give you four little children to take care of because it just isn't working.  And you are pretty sure you are going to have a nervous breakdown (when in fact all you need is some sleep but you forget that part every. single. time.).  And you also speak and write and think in weird fragments.

I don't know what kind of mom I am.  Everybody seems to be all about identifying with different philosophies which can actually be helpful sometimes but I fall right in the middle of a whole lot of things on different issues.  And that's okay I guess.  I'm not an expert on anything.  I do know that I know some things and I do know that as a Christian, I have to live that in every aspect of my life including (ESPECIALLY) in my mothering.  I do know that God DOES care about the choices we make and HOW we come to those parenting decisions.  And I do know that we need to pray about those decisions in light of our Faith.  I do know that it's not all just a crapshoot and I do know that some decisions are better for us than others.  I do know that this vocation is not just a job but is designed to be my path to holiness.  And holiness is crazy hard to live out.  Though plenty easy to talk or type about.

I have no idea if that last take made sense.  But in my head it did.  I'd like to post more about it in the future.  Hopefully, much more coherently.

Favorite quote of the day:  "You know who coined the phrase, "terrible twos"?  Somebody who had never met a three year old-  that's who."  True, dat.

Wow.  This post is WHINY.  And very stream of consciousness.  Stop, Mary.  Okay, want to know what I got yesterday?  I bought my birthday gift early and yes, I bought it myself and don't feel all that bad about it.  I bought myself a Cuisinart ice cream maker.  It was on sale and I had a coupon and I have been planning on asking for it and mostly I just wanted ice cream now and not in two weeks.  Badly.  Vanilla is in progress right now.  Then, watch. out.  Who knows what crazy awesome flavors will be put together??  Give me some suggestions!

Hey, guess what????  We are going on vacation!  Like a real, genuine, honest to goodness, fly in a plane, no other obligations besides being together, making memories VACATION.  That is something to be happy about, right??  For two weeks!  TWO WEEKS!  We are going to be flying into Denver and spending two weeks exploring the Northwest!  How crazy is that?  (Very.)  We're going to travel our way up to Oregon and see my brother and his family and then make our way back down.  It's going to be a lot of driving and that sort of terrifies me.  But you know what?  God made it pretty clear that we're supposed to do this and so we're going.  I'm pretty sure that with four little ones it will be much more "adventure" and much less "vacation."  But all is good and we are pretty psyched.